Today I want to write about a topic, which has been very deep in my heart for the last few years – happiness. I love to talk about positivity and everyone’s different perspectives on it. The fascinating thing about it is that everyone has his or her different way to feel joyful. For some people works this and for other people works that. However, today I will share with you 10 of my personal steps to attract more positivity into my life. Even though every single one of these steps may not work for everyone, I am sure you will find at least one thing that will inspire and help you in some way.
There is one thing that you need to know about happiness. It doesn’t just come to you. One has to create it by oneself, for oneself. It takes a lot of effort, work and patience. It is something I personally work on everyday, by reading books, meditating and trying to be the best version of myself.
Therefore, I would consider myself as a very positive and optimistic person. I have been reading plenty of self-development books since I was 15 years old and therefore gained a lot of experiences in coaching myself and helping others to feel good.
Okay, I feel like I have rambled on for forever, now let’s get into the steps, shall we?
1. Surround yourself with positive people
The people in our lives have probably the biggest influence on us. Our closest ones bring us joy, meaning and above all, they make us realize, that we are all a union. We are stuck in this thing, called life, together and that makes it a lot easier. So, if the people we spend our lives with are so influential, surround yourself with the most positive, inspiring, loving human beings, who will always encourage you to step out of your comfort zone and to make your dreams come true.
Bu,t what if you have that one friend or college that seems to suck out your energy. Who always judges and talks about others, who is complaining about everything, who makes you feel unworthy, unloved and stupid? Yeah, you better watch out for this kind of people, let’s call them the energy vampires. These are the people, who will emotionally exhaust you. Cut those people out of your life! Even, if it’s hard. Do it, you will feel so much better in the long term.
2. Open your mind
“Open-minded people don’t care to be right, they care to understand. Because a wise person knows, that there is something to learn from everyone.”
Having an open mind allows you to look at things from a different point of view. Thus, you will, most certainly, learn way more things, gain new experiences and above all be a pleasant person to talk to.
However, I know this can be so hard sometimes, especially if you are confronted with something or someone you just can’t agree with. Here are two things you can use to learn open-mindedness
- Get out of your comfort zone. Once in a while, listen to a different music genre, or watch a movie from a different genre, try out those “weird” things that someone recommends.
- When you talk to somebody with a totally different opinion, try to detach from your personal opinion and really try to understand his or hers.
3. Think positive
Reframe negative thoughts into positive ones. This could be with small ones, like
- “Oh no, I will be late to this and that, I am always late…” to “I will be late, but that’s ok because my friends are understanding. I will try better next time.”
- “I don’t want to go to the doctor.” to “I am grateful to have access to medicine and I am glad that the doctor will help me with my problem.”
But also with big life issues. At the moment tricky situations seem impossible to handle, but remember that every challenge is an opportunity to grow.
If you have problems in your relationship, for example, remember that it is a beautiful opportunity for both of you to grow stronger together. After every fight you will know more about the other person, you will get closer to one another and this is something beautiful.
4. Learn to say NO
Are you a people pleaser, just like me? I am definitely someone, who can’t say “no” to anything. If somebody asks me for a favor I will say yes almost every time, even if I don’t want to do it. I will say yes to a friend, who wants to catch up, even though I am not feeling well that day.
BUT, that’s a huge problem, because at the end of the day it causes more complications and negativity as if I just said “no” from the beginning. Often it is time-consuming and uses up so much energy, I could use for other things, that are truly valuable to me.
Now I am learning to say “no” to things more often and it is such a relief. Try it out!
5. Practice self-love and self-care
The most important relationship in your life is the one you have with yourself. Because, if you don’t get along with yourself, believe in yourself and validate yourself, you will never feel fully completed.
Find something you can do for yourself to make you feel loved and worthy. Whether it is a nice morning routine with yoga, taking a bath with luxurious oils and a good book or going to the theatre by yourself. Remember, caring for yourself is just as important as caring for others.
6. Read self-development books
I love to read inspiring books with a meaningful message behind it. Honestly, personal growth books is my favorite genre (is this even a genre?). A few books that I have been loving are:
- The Alchemist – Paulo Coelho
- Big Magic – Elizabeth Gilbert
- Siddharta – Hermann Hesse
- The power of now – Eckart Tolle
- A new Earth – Eckart Tolle
- Die Kunst des Liebens – The art of loving – Erich Fromm
Please consider using my affiliate link, if you want to buy a book. I have linked you directly to Amazon. I get a small commission. This means no extra cost to you and would help me finance this blog.
7. Simplify your life
I recently listened to a podcast from my favorite coach Brooke Castillo, which is called “Ep #128 Minimalism – The life coach school podcast” (you can listen to it on Spotify). In the podcast she talks about how she uses minimalism to only focus on the things that are most valuable in her life, like coaching. It really inspired me to get rid of all the excess stuff in my life, because having less clutter will give me more energy to focus on my goals.
Minimalism is all about only having what you really need, enjoying the things you have and not stressing about things you don’t have. This can make life a lot simpler and less stressful.
Here are some benefits:
- Decluttering makes up more space in your home and in your mind
- Less stuff equals more money
- You have more time for the really important things in life
- You have more energy because there are fewer decisions to be made
Besides the material aspect of minimalism, we should focus on keeping it simple in our mind, as well. Overthinking and constantly brooding over things can cause so much stress and worry. It is unnecessary and takes up so much energy, which you could use in a productive way.
8. Create healthy habits
Meditating, exercising, eating healthy and journalling. All of these activities will help you to attract more positivity into your life.
- If you want to read more about creating healthy habits, check out my article “8 healthy habits”.
- You can start working out or doing yoga right now. Read my blog posts “Home-workout for abs” and “Sun salutation”, “12 Yoga poses for beginners”
9. Create rituals and find joy in the small things
The smell of fresh coffee in the morning, a hot shower on a rainy day, having dinner with my family, going to a nice coffee place by myself and journalling, watching Netflix with my boyfriend.. Just to name a few of my rituals, which make my days a little brighter.
I think it’s the small things, which bring the biggest joy in our lives. When was the last time you noticed how grateful you are? Turn everyday routines into moments of meaning.
10. Help others
Last, but not least is to help others and volunteer. This could be small everyday things, like helping your mother with the dishes, donating some money to helpful organizations, all the way to volunteering in Africa. I believe that being self-less once in a while is what gives our lives meaning.
Even though I haven’t been to Africa yet, I will definitely go there someday. For now, I am trying to donate small amounts of money once in a while and help my family and friends, whenever they need my help.
I feel like I have worked on this blog post for forever and it is waaay out of my comfort zone to publish something like this. (perfectionism sucks, haha) But, great things happen outside our comfort zone, so I will publish it right now. No excuses Hana!
I would be more than happy to read what makes you happy. Comment below your personal steps to more positivity in your life!
I hope this blog post helped you in some way or another. Thank you for reading! Have a beautiful and sunny day,
Photo by Dominik Krištof – @lets_live on Instagram
Wearing – Youdecidewhoyouare
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